July 2012
how to summon pigeon satan:
- draw pentagram
- sprinkle bread crumbs over pentagram
ＦＯＯＬＩＳＨ ＭＯＲＴＡＬ ＤＯ ＹＯＵ ＲＥＡＬＬＹ ＴＨＩＮＫ… ＩＳ ＴＨＡＴ ＢＲＥＡＤ
if i had a dollar for every time i was a third wheel
I’m offended that you’re offended
My brother is making old fashioned’s and whiskey sours for us. Then we are going down by the Mississippi to have a bon fire and get even more drunk.
Best Saturday
June 2012
“If I had a nickel for every time I buckled under pressure, I’d have 5 nickels.”
— Hank Hill (via i-m-a-ge)
I think I’m getting bored with B, oops.
God damn gemini shit.
“The odd thing about this form of communication is that you’re more likely to talk about nothing than something. But I just want to say that all this nothing has meant more to me than so many somethings.”
—Kathleen Kelly (You’ve Got Mail)
You know those situations in life where you HAVE to pee, like the doctor hands you a cup and says “pee in this now” and you go to the toilet and just sit there and nothing happens so you drink 5 glasses of water very fast and still don’t have to pee and maybe trickle something out and then 10 minutes after you hand the cup over you can’t stop peeing?
“i’m proud of you; you’ve taken steps, confronted situations,
solved problems, failed, dirtied your hands, climbed obstacles
the sizes of cliffs, and passed through mountains, you didn’t
become a man or woman, you didn’t grow up, you shaped yourself
and in turn; shaped me.” —
solved problems, failed, dirtied your hands, climbed obstacles
the sizes of cliffs, and passed through mountains, you didn’t
become a man or woman, you didn’t grow up, you shaped yourself
and in turn; shaped me.” —
-Rakishi, circ. 1956 “My Father Complex”
(via lylaandblu)
“But sometimes we get sad about things and we don’t like to tell other people that we are sad about them. We like to keep it a secret. Or sometimes we are sad but we don’t really know we are sad. So we say we aren’t sad. But really we are.”
—Mark Haddon, The Curious Incident of the Dog In the Night-Time (via anditslove)
Doo Right
Man Man
I just can’t remember
January straight through December.
My collective memory are in shambles,
And so are my scruples.
you walk like a man
but you talk like a fool
you strut like a stallion
but you hump like a mule
- me: i don't want kids
- them: one da-
- me: no
